Week 2

I drove to Buddy Ball tonight anticipating meeting Ethan's dad, and hoping for another good night. After last week when I had such a great response, a friend of mine gave me advice, saying, "If you ever have a rough night with the group, remember that those guys need you even more when they are unhappy than when they are happy." While I didn't have a bad night per se, I was disappointed and touched all at once.

I arrived around quarter to 6 tonight, and I promptly went in to wait for Ethan. I sat on a chair by myself for about 10 minutes or so in the sweltering alley (the air conditioner no longer works) before someone recognized me. A young man in his late teens to early twenties walked in the door, and immediately ran over to me. He got a big smile on his face, and exclaimed, "Hi Kailynn!!!!" I quickly scrambled and remembered his name (John), and exchanged the usual pleasantries with him, both surprised and touched that he remembered my name, as we had just been bowling next to each other last week, nothing more. His mom called for him to come by her and he replied, "I was just talking to KAILYNN!" before running over. It made me smile.

As for the rest of the night, my smiles were a bit limited at first. I patiently waited for Ethan and his mom or dad, silently kicking myself for not getting their number so we could have some means of communication. I felt obligated to wait for them, as I had promised both Ethan and his mom that I would be his partner this week. Around 6:30, I finally gave up and walked towards the rest of the kids who were bowling. Unfortunately for me, while I had been waiting for Ethan, all the kids who needed Buddies were assigned some, and I was left without a buddy!

I'm not proud of it, but for a few minutes, I thought about leaving, as the evening seemed like a waste if I couldn't contribute in some way. I walked to the end of the alley after deciding to sit and watch, and I ended up near another family I had been bowling next to last week. We exchanged hellos, and after a bit, I noticed 2 tiny boys sitting on the chairs by themselves at the very last lane and looking a bit upset.

Naturally, I walked over and started talking to them. They both had some of those cheap stuffed animals from a claw machine, and I asked if they had won them. They excitedly told me about their claw machine adventures, and somehow I ended up sitting with them and keeping them company. (Non-objective question in regards to my next sentence: why did parents start naming their kids really weird names?!) I learned that the boys' names were Tito and Raina, and they were 6 years old. Raina had gone to Tito's for a playdate and sleepover, and Tito's mom forgot that Buddy Ball was tonight, so she dragged the boys along while Tito's older brother, Cody, "played bowling for his bowling team." The boys were basically neglected, and as Raina put it, they "weren't even allowed to play bowling!!" I asked the boys if I could hang out with them, and somehow, we got involved in an intense game of human bowling. (We used a stuffed pig they had won as a 'bowling ball' and tossed it at each other. If it hit you (the pin) in the stomach or legs, you had to fall down.) The boys started laughing and having a good time, and Tito's mom came running over, immediately scolding them for bothering me. (What is it with parents scolding their kids for bothering me??) I told her we were having a good time playing together, and that the family I normally Buddy with didn't show up so I didn't have anything else to do, as nobody else needed me. She started to thank me before running off mid sentence to check on Cody. The boys and I played for the next hour or so, making up different games with the pig and just having a good ol' time. At some point, I started calling Tito "Spiderman" because he started scaling a wall, and Raina "Flash" because he was so quick. They enjoyed their superhero names, and they called me "Super Girl" because, as Raina put it, "Wonder Woman is old and you're not, and you're not a boy so you can't be Superman." <3

I really got to see a different perspective of an Autistic household today. Tito was thriving on my attention, and he kept running up to me and tackling me in the playful way only a 6 year old can. At one point, he looked at me and said, "This is really weird, you playing and talking with me! Usually when we go to Cody's teams, everybody forgets about me and I get really, really bored. I'm having fun!!!" That completely broke my heart. I was telling my mom about it tonight when I got home, and she said, "You know, that's something not a lot of people would think about. I'm sure in their houses, the kid with problems gets most of the attention. Everyone probably forgets about the other kids."

At the end of the night, Tito's mom came back to collect the boys from me and thank me a lot. We were walking out to the parking lot, and the boys started walking with me, not her! Oops! After we all laughed and the boys went to their car, Raina gave me an adorable smile and gave me a huge hug, saying "It was nice to meet you!" Tito, not wanting to be outdone by his friend, hugged me as well and told me that he hoped to see me again next time.

While I may not have had as rewarding of an experience as last time, I know that I still made a difference. It kills me that siblings of those with disabilities may feel neglected and nobody realizes it. I hope that I can still keep making a difference.